WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR CHILDREN’S SPIRITUAL GROWTH?

Author: Prop. Riëtte Botha (Research | Facilitator: Specialised Training)

EQUIPPING FAMILIES FOR SPIRITUAL GROWTH: TOGETHER

The Bible clearly places the responsibility for a child’s spiritual growth on the parents. Proverbs 22:6 (NIV) says, “Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.”

Similarly, Deuteronomy 6:6-7 commands, “These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.”

A 2024 study on the influences in a child’s journey with Christ and the Bible confirms this view. Parents overwhelmingly said they believe it is their role to lead their children spiritually. Youth responses echoed this sentiment, naming their mom, dad, and grandparents as the most significant influences. Spiritual leaders also emphasised that parents are the primary guides for children's faith formation.

The Parenting Gap: Willing but Unprepared

From this, we can conclude that the most influential environment for spiritual growth is the family unit. However, the same study revealed a concerning gap: while most parents want to be responsible for their children’s spiritual development, 74% admit they do not know how to do it.

In response to this challenge, some families seek churches where Sunday school is fun and where their children’s friends attend. Others look for churches with strong, Bible-based children’s curricula.

But Petra Institute proposes a deeper, more effective solution: churches should not only provide programs for children but also equip families to grow spiritually together.

This does not mean merely offering a course for parents on talking to their children about God. Instead, we advocate for practical, shared spiritual experiences during church services that engage the whole family together.

A Practical Model: Family-Centred Church Experiences

These shared experiences can take many forms. One example is arranging families to sit together at tables during the service. Grandparents and single church members can be included, forming multigenerational groups. A trained facilitator at each table can guide the discussion, ensuring everyone - children and adults alike - have an opportunity to participate.

It’s okay if younger children don’t grasp every concept. What’s more important is that they observe their parents' faith in action: how they speak about God, how they pray, and how they listen. Proverbs 20:7 reminds us, “The righteous lead blameless lives; blessed are their children after them.”

Children learn by imitation. As the old saying goes: “Children do what you do, not what you say” (Robinson, 2025).

The pastor or leader introduces a Bible reading or discussion topic from the front, then gives time for the groups to respond. Afterwards, the pastor gives the next step, continuing the message piece by piece in an interactive format. This method naturally places parents in a spiritual leadership role and builds their confidence.

Through this approach, parents influence their children in four key areas (Yates & Avenant, 2025):

Setting a faith example: “Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ” (1 Corinthians 11:1).
Mentoring their children spiritually: “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” (Ephesians 6:4).
Fulfilling a socialising role through faith: “These words… shall be in your heart… You shall teach them diligently to your children.” (Deuteronomy 6:6–7, repeated for emphasis).
Building a positive, faith-centred parent-child relationship: “Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him” (Psalm 127:3).

When this step-by-step formula is used consistently during church services, families begin to internalise the pattern. Then, continuing the habit at home becomes simple: the family only needs to agree on a time each day to gather and follow the same model. As Joshua 24:15 declares, “As for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”

So, who is truly responsible for shaping a child’s faith?

The answer lies not just in programmes or curriculum, but in the faithful presence of parents, caregivers, and churches who journey together.

At Petra Institute, we believe that when families grow spiritually together, children flourish. That’s why we work alongside churches, schools, and organisations, offering consulting, workshops, and relational partnerships tailored to your unique context.

How can we join hands with your church, organisation, or school?

Petra Institute has trained leaders in more than 60 countries, equipping communities to welcome and disciple children through relational, Bible-based approaches.

Let’s explore how we can partner with you to build a church where faith is not just taught, but lived and multiplied.

Find out how to partner with us

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BIBLIOGRAPHY

Botha, A. & Dreyer, Y., 2025. Die erediens as hart van missionale gemeentewees: Kinders en adolessente. Verbum et Ecclesia, 46(a3280).
Robinson, C. B., 2025. Toerusting van ouers. Verbum et Ecclesia, 46(2)(a3289).
Yates, H. & Avenant, J. C., 2025. Ouers se primêre rol in geloofsvorming. Verbum et Ecclesia, 46(a3321).

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